![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
goldvermilion87You know how there's always that character in a story who is very crotchety, but good-hearted, and does good things even though he's sniping at everyone around him? It sounds cute, right? And actions speak louder than words. I won't deny that.
HOWEVER
I have come to the conclusion that attitude and words are more important than those cute grouchy-with-heart-of-gold stories would have us believe.
I usually take the 11:26 bus home after I teach. The 11:26 bus driver is an older man. He is one of those bus drivers who make sure that you know they hate their job, and that opening the door for you is an imposition, but they'll do it anyway because they have to. He is one of those bus drivers who grumble to themselves as people get on and off the bus, and, should a person make some kind of mistake--any kind of mistake--they will loudly fuss at that person.
A few days ago I was on the bus, and really starting to get annoyed inside by the bus driver's attitude. It makes the whole ride feel unpleasant, and it makes me so nervous--like I might accidentally get out of my seat too early or too late and earn the wrath of the grumpy-pants bus driver.
I had finally gotten to the stage of composing witty quips in my head that I could share with my friends to express my dislike of bus drivers who turn everything they do into a huge, and unwillingly conferred favor. Suddenly, the bus stopped. And he shouted in his imposed-upon voice:
"Hey! It's your stop! Will someone get that guy up? It's his stop!"
He had been keeping an eye on all the people in the bus, and knew the stop of one of the gentlemen on it. That gentleman had fallen asleep, so the bus driver took the extra effort to get him off at his stop. This really wasn't necessary, and if he hadn't woken him up, the gentleman would only have had to wait another 20 minutes or so before they passed his stop again. Conclusion: the bus driver was observant and thoughtful enough to notice a problem, and kind enough to fix it.
But he acted so mean and put upon while he did it.
I realized, thinking back, that he had done this before. One day we were leaving the main freshman dorm bus stop, and would be leaving the university itself far behind. He was starting to pull out when he shouted whinily, "Where are you guys going?!?!?!?"
We were all very confused, and he got even more annoyed, because we weren't following him.
"There should not be this many people on the bus! This is the airport bus! Where are you all going?" And he waited for us all to tell him where we were going. Again, he sounded like he was mad at us all for daring to be on the bus. The fact is, though, if some poor freshman were confused about the bus routes, he would be on the bus for maybe fourty minutes before getting back to campus, if he didn't realize his mistake. The bus driver was looking out for us, in the most unpleasant way possible.
There were two lessons I drew from this. First, don't be too judgemental. I felt very guilty for all the nasty things I was thinking in my head when the bus driver stopped and woke up the poor old guy who was going to miss his stop. Second, try to be pleasant, because if you're not, people won't realize that you're being nice.
But then, such weird inconsistencies can only be expected in every one of us, since we are, as Shakespeare expressed so well, but the "Quintessence of Dust"
HOWEVER
I have come to the conclusion that attitude and words are more important than those cute grouchy-with-heart-of-gold stories would have us believe.
I usually take the 11:26 bus home after I teach. The 11:26 bus driver is an older man. He is one of those bus drivers who make sure that you know they hate their job, and that opening the door for you is an imposition, but they'll do it anyway because they have to. He is one of those bus drivers who grumble to themselves as people get on and off the bus, and, should a person make some kind of mistake--any kind of mistake--they will loudly fuss at that person.
A few days ago I was on the bus, and really starting to get annoyed inside by the bus driver's attitude. It makes the whole ride feel unpleasant, and it makes me so nervous--like I might accidentally get out of my seat too early or too late and earn the wrath of the grumpy-pants bus driver.
I had finally gotten to the stage of composing witty quips in my head that I could share with my friends to express my dislike of bus drivers who turn everything they do into a huge, and unwillingly conferred favor. Suddenly, the bus stopped. And he shouted in his imposed-upon voice:
"Hey! It's your stop! Will someone get that guy up? It's his stop!"
He had been keeping an eye on all the people in the bus, and knew the stop of one of the gentlemen on it. That gentleman had fallen asleep, so the bus driver took the extra effort to get him off at his stop. This really wasn't necessary, and if he hadn't woken him up, the gentleman would only have had to wait another 20 minutes or so before they passed his stop again. Conclusion: the bus driver was observant and thoughtful enough to notice a problem, and kind enough to fix it.
But he acted so mean and put upon while he did it.
I realized, thinking back, that he had done this before. One day we were leaving the main freshman dorm bus stop, and would be leaving the university itself far behind. He was starting to pull out when he shouted whinily, "Where are you guys going?!?!?!?"
We were all very confused, and he got even more annoyed, because we weren't following him.
"There should not be this many people on the bus! This is the airport bus! Where are you all going?" And he waited for us all to tell him where we were going. Again, he sounded like he was mad at us all for daring to be on the bus. The fact is, though, if some poor freshman were confused about the bus routes, he would be on the bus for maybe fourty minutes before getting back to campus, if he didn't realize his mistake. The bus driver was looking out for us, in the most unpleasant way possible.
There were two lessons I drew from this. First, don't be too judgemental. I felt very guilty for all the nasty things I was thinking in my head when the bus driver stopped and woke up the poor old guy who was going to miss his stop. Second, try to be pleasant, because if you're not, people won't realize that you're being nice.
But then, such weird inconsistencies can only be expected in every one of us, since we are, as Shakespeare expressed so well, but the "Quintessence of Dust"